Drawing Akusora and Soriku :D

When I say that I want to be really dedicated to my blog, is the moment I have nothing to write :( kind of ironic..
Well, Today I have been drawing and coloring the whole day, kinda great, but I was really close to be grounded for being in the computer the whole day. "What are you doing?"-my father asked. "I'm practicing with the tablet", I said, and of course I was drawing porn haha

I did 2 Kingdom Hearts fanarts, I would love to be able to draw beautiful Sora x everyone porn xD just as great as Ssize/Sam. Her doujinshi are the best and I wish I could have them all, but I was checking ebay and other pages yesterday searching for them...and god...one of them cost $99.99 while every other doujinshi by other artist cost $9.99 ....like WHAT?! _(>:'O>L)_ there goes my hopes and dreams....

 

This are the fanarts I did today, sadly the first one got reported on y-gallery! I guess it's because I didn't tagged it in the shota filter, I have always had this problem, and it sucks, because I don't think it's adult imagery to be filtered....but who knows...

My father is awake right now trying to eat something, so, I better leave now...Good night!! 

Akusora is my drug

Talking about my current and never ending obsession, here is some Akusora I found on tumblr lately!

(this can be Riku or Axel anyway haha)


I know Akusora is popular but not as much as Soriku and Akuroku which I'm not into that much...I love Ssize/Samwise art and everything she does is so cute and funny. I don't know if I'm the only one who takes as canon the things that happen in her doujinshi? hahaha I love her Soriku stuff but I love even more when she makes Akusora.
Ok, I sound a little retard talking in Shipping names....but everytime I find something with Axel and Sora in the same picture makes me go stupid and happy haha

Wish I could draw nice Kingdom heart fanart like her, sadly I get frustrated everytime I draw Sora because his outfit...is so damn hard to draw with all the chains and details (>o<) feels you Nomura.....

Well, I was feeling down today when I woke up but now I feel refresh and motivated to do stuff! :)

I'm not dead! :D

Aaaaaaaaah!!!! Long time since my last entry!!!! ToT
There's nothing to tell to be honest. Maybe the only thing that's on my mind is that I'm really thinking about coming out as a male trans. It's not something I just decided lately. It's something I have feel since I'm really young, but never had the guts to admit.
It's really hard to deal with this situation when all the ppl around you think it's only a whim, that I just gave up because I cannot find a nice bra.......DIE! but everytime I try to explain it, I can't do it and don't feel stupid by their opinion. You really have not idea what it's like to live feeling that you were born in the wrong body and have to resign to be called and treated as someone you don't feel any attachment with.

I told a friend a little about it, and she took it better than my sister, but i'm sure she didn't understand what I really meant....maybe....if she did...then, great! I would feel really happy is someone finally understand me.

Anyway, I finally draw another Kuroshitsuji fanart. But sadly I did something horrible (hahahaha) I feel the entire "Fandomhive" will hate me because this (;o;) please don't, I have cookies and tea!

Baron Kelvin is the most disgusting character Yana Toboso could ever create. Somehow, I can't feel but pity for him. Maybe I can relate with the feeling of "not good enough" he felt. He just wanted to be equal to Ciel. Of course, his desire went too far and he just ended up in a really pathetic dead. Well, he was pretty pathetic himself...
I really love this arc. it was so twisted and sick. I really miss this Kuroshitsuji...new arc is really disappointing and the new chapter.......UNDERTAKER?! I could see it coming and I really hate it! but I really hope things get better in the coming chapters!

 I wanted to write a good review of Baron Kelvin, but words don't come out..

Cat moron! you are making me sneeze

Drawing again! I really like this version, I drew them before but it was too simple, so it's time to make a better one. I did this for my two favorite Roleplayers on Tumblr.
I'm not into roleplaying, and it's hard to find someone who get the character's essence. But they are pretty awesome!
Finished version: Mouse Ciel & Sebastian-Cat

I found amusing that Ciel is allergic to cats, and Sebastian is a cat. So imagine him dealing with his allergies every fucking day because -like it or not- Sebastian is always near him.
I'm a little scare of myself, because i'm too conscious of getting notes on tumblr now ;o; NO!!!!! I don't like that! It won't be fun anymore, but I'll try to relax......OTL



Nothing to write about to be honest :) So better go! bye

getting back to death note again...

Wow...I have been so absent that it's not even funny...well, I have been struggling with depression again, and I don't want to puke words full of bullshits.
This last weeks had a lot of drama and misunderstandings. I'm so mad at a friend rn, well, If I can still call her my friend...tbh I don't mind losing someone like her, she is so fake I don't even give a shit...what made me mad is because she caused troubles between another friend -who I really love and care about- and me. But I guess everything is going well for now.

also, I found out about "Death Note/Another Note: The Los Angeles BB murder cases"...Death Note is the manga that changed my life...what kind of fan I am if I didn't know about this novel!!! I decided to re-read DN manga before reading this novel. Lots of memories come back to me! I enjoyed drawing DN fanarts a lot then, don't know why i stopped...

I have been learning some Kpop choreographies LOL I suck at dancing but it's fun...My body hurts so much right now that I don't want to try it for now...I really want to learn those for reasons...oh yeah, I'm on vacations! Last month I had the last class left to finish the career...then there's only one seminary left and then official graduation (*`O´*) I can't believe I did it, BUT.....this doesn't make me happy at all...

Cannot believe I forgot How much I enjoyed drawing this dude, is Raito btw, hahaha this looks pretty lame, like a ID picture...planning on doing something "interesting" with this portrait...

This entry is so bipolar.....

It's Friday!!! (T_T) and I finally have my portfolio printed!!! now I just have to worry about print my business card and all my other projects, anyway, tonight I plan to relax and draw something...

The new Kuroshitsuji Mousepad is so cuteee

So yeah! I wanted to draw something inspired by this....

How are supposed to be Ciel's shoes??!!  Anyway, this is just the wip of course xD

btw, I made another Twitter account...I don't know why but meanwhile is kind of fun ...I will closed it eventually though ...that's for sure u_u 

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FUCK this! -changing topic- everytime i plan to going out with friends, they always cancel!!!! :( I was going to the movies tomorrow, but it seems we won't...and the worst part is that the annoyed is my stupid sister, because she was using my plan to go out with her boyfriend, and now she is forcing me to do something tomorrow....I don't fucking care anyway...I will stay alone tomorrow then, it's ok for me but...fuck this shit....this suck balls! I'm fucking mad right now, not because my friends but my sister....she is a total idiot...

Great, i want to cry because the anger i feel...I want to fucking kill this bitch right now, but it would be useless, this is so stupid I can't even....the thing that makes me mad is the shit she has said right now... ARGH!!!! I can't do anything to make me feel better...i'm so out of control and all this shit is so fucking stupid! 

Jinko's art is beautiful

HI! ugh! I had to go to university today...my free day OTL!!!
It was a waste though, but at least I have nothing to do for tomorrow, so I have been looking Jinko Twitpic gallery xD...She is another Kuroshitsuji fanartist and I LOVE her style, but I don't like the way she colors u_u
So here come a little spam by Jinko

She has really cute art, and sexy too (;o;)! 

oh yeah, lately I have been talking with my ex, and it doesn't matter how bad I feel sometimes, I really enjoy talking to her, this make me happy, but will stay strong...(*`-´*)

I got a headache, and took 2 pills and drank coffee, but nothing works for me, at least it's not migraine...but I guess i'm going to bed early tonight

.....GEEZ...just 3 weeks to finish everything!!!! Excited but kind of scared, sometimes I wish the world would finish in 3 months u_u

btw, This is the original outfit I dreamed for the fanart I did last time:

(Big head...hahaha....crap...Why did i draw it? idk, because I have nothing to do with my life)

I will practice watercolor more!

Hi!! uff, finally finished the fanart...3 days working on it D:!
I wanted to do something different and tried watercolor again...and FUCK! bad idea ...I used too much water, the paper got -what's the word?- .... "se me enrollo de tanta agua" (;o;)!!!

When I bought this notebook, I was planning to use this kind of techniques, watercolor, acrylic....but using color pencil is easier and faster...i have no patient to wait for it to dry....and because of that i messed up with this one, but at the end I did the base with watercolor and fix some shadows with color pencil...so i think it looks nice....*Won't submit the final version here*
Anyway, I'm happy with the result...I really love when i have something to work with, I usually get bored when I draw, and never finish but this one was fun, and love this feeling, when you really want to work in something, you can't even sleep thinking about it...the only problem is that I didn't want to work in my class projects, and didn't, in fact I missed today's class...didn't do the homework, but it was ok because it wasn't for today, it's for next week, so i can work on it now! (-_-);;;;;;;;

When i was skipping my class, i drew something, and tend to do this to kill some time, but there's something I don't get....Why do I get embarrassed when people see i'm drawing? when someone is approaching to me, i hide everything right away...this has something to do with my LOW self esteem...and the fact I think people underestimate manga style u_u but, I feel like people will make fun of me...I know it won't happen but just think about it makes me shiver...and feel stupid...maybe i am stupid for think like this right?

anyway...this is what i drew today....yes! i'm having my fanboy moment again!

"Call now! HOTLINE Phantomhive"

Inspired by chapter 71, I just loved it too much, I don't know, but I think all the "master plan" to expose Maurice was Sebastian's idea...or should I give Ciel some credits? It was too perfect ... *sigh*

I had troubles with the cross-hatching, specially with Sebastian and his rosary x_x 

I'm thinking about close my DA account and make an Artblog on tumblr...*think think*

Going to sleep! 

analyzing Ciel (*`O´*)

three entries for today is just a sign I don't want to work xD


Everytime I draw a Kuroshitsuji fanart i have lots of fun....of course, it comes to get annoying when i have to look for references...

You know, I was like "Let's Draw full page right away!!!" until I realized i need fucking references for clothes...I know I was going to draw what i saw in my dreams, it's like a magician outfit hahahaha ;;;;;;;;;; but I'm pretty bad with fashion, and Ciel is always fabulous so references are a MUST! (*`^´*)jum!

This is when i realized i need references...I redid Ciel's body like million times, in the first sketch (above) his legs look damn long, like a 16 year old boy or something...Ciel is big head and small legs right? 

Tried my best to draw him as a 13 years old boy...not mention Sebastian and his giant body...well, you can't see it here, I like ciel's face but no Sebastian's....never happy, never satisfied...eh?! oh yeah, Ciel is holding a -invisible- wand ...for this magician thing i dreamed about...and now, as the designer i am ( ● ｀ ー ´ ● ) -has nothing to do with this anyway- i will explain why....

Ciel is always ordering Sebastian to accomplish impossible -for humans- things, everyone think they both are too skillful, like magical -- Ciel is always tricking his enemies getting ahead of them but of course Sebastian is the one behind the tricks, the one who do the "magic tricks", like in a magic show, the assistant is the one who does everything...hahahaha 

what a smart explanation.....(--__________--) in a dilemma if I should make Ciel in tights or nude legs...

btw, searching for references for Ciel's body, hahaha yeah! I needed to prove his tiny body according to his head...I found this, which I may say is one of my favorite arts by Toboso Sensei

Such lovely art, the colors and the clothes design! 

I love everything about this picture, even forgiving the fact Ciel is always like 0 weight,  Sebastian is too fucking strong or Ciel doesn't weight any fucking gram, this get in my nerves in the anime...Ciel is always rigid when Sebastian carries him...doesn't this annoy anyone else? just me? well, I draw it like that too (Sebastian holding ciel's butt with one hand...one hell of a lifter) 

ANYWAY! going to sleep! I need to wake up early tomorrow to work hahahahah *cries*

Because one is not enough...Himetsuka sensei!

jojojo Shina Himetsuka spam coming next!!

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This are not new, but i never saw them before, so that's why i'm fanboying like idiot right now, I was going to work but you know what, FUCK OFF i'm going to draw something right now! I love her artwork(●´ω`●) 
Seriously, I really regret that I don't enjoy her doujinshis as much as I enjoy her artwork!

I have read just a few, but i will search for more...this are the one I've read so far:
★666 Days
★Cocoon
★Pink Night
★Last fruit
★Sugar Rabbit
★Dance a Waltz
★One's Dear One

Going to draw the fanart I mentioned earlier, I have the night and all tomorrow to work xD besides, my grades are fucking great! I can't relax this last month!! -Will remember this words in my -Last minute- suffering..-

"Ikuso! Neko baka" ヽ(●´ε｀●)ノ

-procrastinating like always-
I got this need for Kingdom Hearts again thanks to the lovely RBIT and her stunning cosplays (*`^´*) She looks really tired in this pic btw

I have been listening to Miyu Irino and his version of "Under the Sea" the whole day....it's not even enough! I want to play KH2 so bad but my disc doesn't work anymore.....*TEARS...LOTS OF TEARS*
My brother in law gave it to me as a present, I can't believe is not working anymore, it wasn't brand new but it was a gift!!!! of course, my KH1 and Birth by sleep still work, but I don't like them THAT much hahaha....I'm stuck fighting Cloud in kh1 and going to fight Vanitas in BBS xD which scare me like an idiot...someday I will finish them!!!!!

anyway, I finished the Leon I was working on for my friend, a really hard taks

Drawing this makes me realize that in the whole internet Leon is never looking to the right, all the references are facing to the left which made this even harder for me xD my wonderful observations....
Someone asked me what color pencil brand I use to coloring, and yeah i used Prisma colors in a while, but i just don't like the way it looks when you use textured paper, and i usually draw in a small scale, the softness in those becomes troublesome in small areas...that's why my favorite brand to color is Faber Castell, they are soft but not too soft, and are easier to sharp, they color well in most of the surfaces, even in bond paper (This fanart is drawn on Bond) of course, I don't recommend Bond paper to work with traditional media.. Prisma Colors work wonderful in this type of paper though, and of course this depend on the person's skills to work with color pencil. I'm the opinion that it's not needed to buy expensive art supplies to make wonderful art, you can  even color with Facela or any cheap brand, the love you put in a piece is what matters...u_u there's nothing better than a drawing/writing -any kind of art- where you can feel the passion and efforts the artist /author put in it.

Anyway, I haven't write about kuroshitsuji lately....give me a prize for it...xD No Ciel, I haven't forgotten about you *pat pat*

In fact, when I was fighting against my will to still on bed and getting up to work yesterday, an image pop up in my head, so maybe i will be drawing a Kuroshitsuji fanart soon hahahahhaa....wish I could come up with good ideas to my class projects like that....

(*`O´*)

SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP!!!!! i'm so fucking sick of my fucking parents!!!! *sigh*

anyway, i'm not ranting about this stuff here u__________u
I spent my day coloring the fanart! I'm really happy by how it came out

Can't explain the feelings i have when i do this, maybe this manga has become too special for me right now, and i know everyone around me is tired of it, and it makes me really sad because i want to draw more of this, i feel really happy and i think that's important. Long time since i last felt motivated and excited of drawing and loving something. It's like when i got obsessed by Kingdom Hearts, i still love it deeply but i didn't draw all i wanted because i felt rejected by everyone, it's like nobody around me likes the same stuff and then i lost motivation because i feel i have to do what everyone wants me to do...

Oh well, there's nothing to write about right now...this weekend i'm going to my sister's place, we will watch the entire Alien franchise.....yay... --__________________-- i liked those movies, i enjoyed them when i was 10 years old, but it's not my type of movies now...having a good time is what matters right? :)

To love ru y mas fanart

Wow...No tengo nada que hacer para escribir dos entradas el mismo dia...
Lo curioso es que no tengo nada que contar xD bueno, suponiendo que esta es continuación de la entrada de más temprano.

Siempre que estoy en la PC y no encuentro que más hacer, me pongo a buscar si To Love Ru darkness ha sido actualizada, y siempre pasa que si xD ese manga actualiza bien seguido, y solo porque me gusta el estilo de dibujo, la sigo. Si tan solo mis mangas favoritos actualizaran asi de rapido...Debo admitir que el ultimo chapter fue conmovedor...

Ver a Nana hundida en el sentimiento de haber perdido a su unica amiga, Mea, me conmovio muy profundamente, y cuando Rito la abraza, yo ya estaba llorando hahahaha;;;;;;; Este manga tiene muy pocas dosis de sentimentalismo, pero este estuvo muy bonito, obviando que despues siguieron siendo los mismos random frustrados sexualmente que siempre han sido....osea, Rito siendo el hombre del grupo por primera vez en su vida, y desps incomodo por haber abrazado a Nana ¬_¬ Oh bueno...To Love Ru me gusta a pesar de la formula Ecchi llegando al hentai que tiene...no es que lo pervertido me moleste, es solo que las situaciones son ilogicas y predecibles xD como en uno de los ultimos donde a Rito lo transforman en las pantys de Mikan su hermana xD eso si es AWKWARD, lastima que lo dejaron en -continuacion- habiendo una historia de fondo que esta en su mejor momento...bueno, peor es nada D:



Y como la buena coneja trabajadora que soy, me puse a recordar algo que habia visto en TUMBLR, si...de Kuro.....una confesion que decia que Despues de transformado en demonio, Ciel y Sebastian tendrian "mind blowing demon sex" hahahahahhaa asi q digamos q mi mente volo un poco...claro no soy muy creativa para esas cuestiones pero algo surgio u____u

estoy contenta con Sebastian, pero al entintarlo, lo heche a perder u_____________u pero bueno...Se que SebastianxCiel es muy solicitado, jojojo pero fue divertido....
Y es ironico, porque aunque no tengo ningun problema con el shota, hoy me cayo nuevamente una invitacion a unirme al "proyecto Boys hypnosis" que mencione la vez anterior...pero ahora me contactaron en DeviantArt... >_>;;;; En serio...dejenme en paz! ya les habia dicho que no estaba interesada, pero que me consta que nadie lee las respuestas q uno les manda....me suenan a una mega red de pedofilos...claro, no es que las personas que dibujen shota sean pedofilos, pero es demasiado extraño ese grupo en particular...reclutando artistas para tal proyecto con un cierto numero de condiciones.... mmmm :/

oh bueno! ando antojo de pizza xD ....

coloring progress and camwhoring

It's Friday!!! :D
It's not like i will do something tonight, but i can rest and work tomorrow xD

OK!, nothing good to write about, just feeling happy because i finished the drawing, now i have both versions.  I did a gif about the coloring progress again. Sadly my photoshop made an error and i couldn't save the whole process step by step, so it's not that detailed.... :( i think i did a little too fast in "I like how the colors look" -___-;; and too slow in other parts that should be faster hahaha i suck doing Gif

Oyasumi Bocchan /Oyasumi Danna-sama

I used more time with Sebastian's, but i'm pleased with the other one too.

This are the colors i liked xD i don't know why

wow....i have nothing to write... hahahahaha

anyway, i was camwhoring today 

loved my hair in the morning -we can't see it here;;;;;- but at the end of the day it was just a messy crap over my head D': i dont have upper lip (;o;) i wish my lips were a little more..... noticeable......hahahhaha  oh well, i'm bored...i want to go out but i already spent the day outside eating and drinking yummy cake and green tea smoothie

i should stop eating cake.....i will get fatter T_T