#4 I'm fine

Sometimes you don't need a reason to feel miserable, you just do. Feeling like you can't control anything but the urge, feeling like you have nothing worth giving or sharing and they give you something to hide and stories behind. Hiding yourself from people but wishing they would notice and understand who you are... Feeling stupid for doing this but this is all you can do for yourself. The irony of feeling proud for having them, for showing them, for expecting others to see and know how you feel... Basing your worth by how big or deep or visible the wound is, because if you didn't go all the way through you are a coward, trash. Hate yourself for doing it but hate yourself more for not doing it often. Faking smiles every day is annoying , faking being normal is exhausting when all you can think about is to end it all...sometimes you don't need a reason to feel miserable, you just do.