analyzing Ciel (*`O´*)

three entries for today is just a sign I don't want to work xD


Everytime I draw a Kuroshitsuji fanart i have lots of fun....of course, it comes to get annoying when i have to look for references...

You know, I was like "Let's Draw full page right away!!!" until I realized i need fucking references for clothes...I know I was going to draw what i saw in my dreams, it's like a magician outfit hahahaha ;;;;;;;;;; but I'm pretty bad with fashion, and Ciel is always fabulous so references are a MUST! (*`^´*)jum!

This is when i realized i need references...I redid Ciel's body like million times, in the first sketch (above) his legs look damn long, like a 16 year old boy or something...Ciel is big head and small legs right? 

Tried my best to draw him as a 13 years old boy...not mention Sebastian and his giant body...well, you can't see it here, I like ciel's face but no Sebastian's....never happy, never satisfied...eh?! oh yeah, Ciel is holding a -invisible- wand ...for this magician thing i dreamed about...and now, as the designer i am ( ● ｀ ー ´ ● ) -has nothing to do with this anyway- i will explain why....

Ciel is always ordering Sebastian to accomplish impossible -for humans- things, everyone think they both are too skillful, like magical -- Ciel is always tricking his enemies getting ahead of them but of course Sebastian is the one behind the tricks, the one who do the "magic tricks", like in a magic show, the assistant is the one who does everything...hahahaha 

what a smart explanation.....(--__________--) in a dilemma if I should make Ciel in tights or nude legs...

btw, searching for references for Ciel's body, hahaha yeah! I needed to prove his tiny body according to his head...I found this, which I may say is one of my favorite arts by Toboso Sensei

Such lovely art, the colors and the clothes design! 

I love everything about this picture, even forgiving the fact Ciel is always like 0 weight,  Sebastian is too fucking strong or Ciel doesn't weight any fucking gram, this get in my nerves in the anime...Ciel is always rigid when Sebastian carries him...doesn't this annoy anyone else? just me? well, I draw it like that too (Sebastian holding ciel's butt with one hand...one hell of a lifter) 

ANYWAY! going to sleep! I need to wake up early tomorrow to work hahahahah *cries*

Oyasumi Danna-sama????

Wow, i just love when Ciel shouts "SEBASTIAN" (and coming after a "MEREDA"....UFF) i couldn't help drawing this. My sister already asked if this scene wouldn't be different, i mean, me fangirling over Sebastian instead of ciel xD Of course!
Besides, i love Ciel's outfit in the Zombies Arc, the one with the Titanic references --__--;;;; His clothing is just too beautiful, sad i don't know the right colors for it, there's only B/W artwork of it :(

Oh yeah, last night, i decided to finish Ciel in Wonderland, and everything was happiness until the very end of the OVA.....*SPOILER*............................................Sebastian reading to Ciel's empty body.........(T_T)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hahahahaha so depressing! :'( i'm still sobbing...

Anyway, i wanted to draw Claude, and because i don't forgive his whoring with Ciel, this is Claude's version of "Oyasumi Bocchan" (the one i did with Sebastian and Ciel in front the red windows) xD

I don't like Claude's contract mark, is really plain and boring designed...well, Hannah's worst....¬_¬ but it's easy to draw, so i don't complain...there's a reason i don't draw Sebastian's xD

Alois' Pajamas are ridiculous, but in him looks good, but in Ciel...D: is a totally no no...his -shirt- is sexy enough for him, but he is in Trancy's residence, so deal with it and draw him in those >_< Why does Claude's hand is in Bocchan's mouth? because i'm such a slutty perv  he is always asking Ciel to make a contract with him, and you know, Alois's mark is in his tongue, so i thought that's how Claude does it xD ...in other words, Ciel is NOT safe in the Trancy's butler hands :V -i finally like how Ciel came out-







This is what i mean...Sebastian's is cooler xD.....oh boy, how many mark does this boy need...such a desirable soul of him...i hate Hannah.....hahahhaha

I don't want to go to classes tomorrow...

I'm too Obvious xD

I was planning doing nothing this day, instead of drawing a lot, but i have to participate in my class forum x_x  i could check everyone else's answers to make my own, but i don't like cheating so i'm going to read the whole document to get the answers D: i just don't feel like doing it right now :(

i guess this is something everyone already noticed, but i cannot sleep until i prove i'm right xD

Ciel's eyes are different color in season 2 xD, they are more like turquoise, and i guess it's because the ring holding his soul...obvious logic of mine D: besides i noticed the different art style. It's a little simpler than the  first season.  I don't know, but watching both seasons, i like more the Ciel from K2, he is more like the Ciel in the manga, i don't know...

Anyway, i was drawing something related to episode 22 (guess) when Sebastian abandoned Ciel...

Unlikely what most people may think, this pose is freaking hard, for me it is --____-- i used reference and still it doesn't look right, something about body proportions, you know, legs looks too long according to his torso. Oh well, i can fix it yet :) but besides Ciel's body, the hardest shit in this is the fucking cat -coughSebastiancough- I believe that cat looking at ciel in the episode is Sebastian looking after his bocchan (;o;) I think it's a lovely scene when Ciel called the cat to join him while sleep, he is allergic to cats -if i'm not wrong- and i bet he thought of Sebastian when he saw the cat (T^T) that's why i'm moved to draw it. Stupid Ciel who can't even hold a damn animal (¬_¬);;;

Ok, i'm to read and finish this :)!

Cosas que no comparto con nadie...

Casualmente esta noche he estado pensando muchas cosas, que muchos pueden considerar sin sentido, sin embargo, hoy que lo pienso bien, siempre he sentido esa astillita en mi interior...y es respecto a mi genero...

Quizas no soy como ese tipo de personas que toman el riesgo de comenzar una transformacion total, sobretodo porque para ese tipo de cuestiones, necesitas el apoyo de otros, porque no es como simplemente cortarme el pelo y ya -cosa que incluso en mi casa reprochan terriblemente- es un cambio realmente, y cuando me pongo a pensarlo, siento que es algo que me gustaria mucho hacer.
Siempre he sido alguien que busca un punto medio, y eso aplica tambien a mi identidad, desde pequeña siempre pelee contra la diferencia de trato que tenia por ser una niña en comparacion de mis compañeros varones. Incluso ahora odio que se me identifique como mujer, puede que para muchos sea estupido, que solo soy una lesbiana feminista caprichosa, eso no tiene nada que ver y muy dentro mio siento que es mucho mas. Ademas que NO me considero lesbiana ni hetero...

Pero siento que no puedo tomar este tipo de decisiones, la opinion de mi hermana me marca fuertemente, he visto muchas personas que estan en proceso de transformacion, y es maravilloso haber llegado a un punto de decision y no dar marcha atras. Muy dentro mio lloro, porque pienso que me gustaria eso para mi tambien, sin embargo, lucho diariamente con la persona que quiero ser y la persona que los demas quieren que sea. La opinion ajena no deberia de importar, si me quiero cortar el cabello, salir sin maquillaje y vestir ropa de hombre deberia ser muy mi cosa, pero aceptemoslo, tengo baja el autoestima, no hago esas cosas, porque siempre me recuerdan que es estupido...a mi hermana por ejemplo, es un pecado que merece pena de muerte salir de casa sin maquillaje, son incontable las veces que me ha fusilado porque no quiero hecharme base o delineador. No mencionemos la vez que me corte el cabello, no hubo dia en que me hiciera sentir mal por haberlo hecho, aunque dentro mio estaba contenta porque era algo que yo queria hacer...le doy demasiado poder a alguien que no lo tiene...

Odio mi cuerpo, odio mis pechos...odio todo eso que me hace mujer, no se, es algo complicado, es un sentimiento que no muchos comprenden, y yo estoy asimilando poco a poco que quizas la razon de todos mis males mentales, esten relacionados con mi malestar superficial. Solo existe una persona en este mundo a quien yo le he confesado mi insatisfaccion, y creo que es la unica persona que no me ha dicho que estoy loca y que es cuestion de madurez...desgraciadamente perdi a esa persona, por alguien que nunca en su vida ha tenido la delicadeza de entenderme, pero que mas da...Quizas me frustro aun mas, porque no hay nadie con quien pueda hablar, a quien pueda pedir consejos...mi unico consuelo es leer los blogs de personas que estan en la misma situacion, pero no es lo mismo...

Esto me deprime mucho, el odio que siento por mi va mas alla de lo fisico...

Para variar, hoy no hay Kuroshitsuji en mi entrada, mas bien un monton de palabras sin sentido